Finding Ease in an Uneasy Season
Life is asking a lot of us right now, isn’t it?
The pace of change, the volume of information, the uncertainty of an election with sky-high stakes. And that’s all layered on top of life's usual tugs: the shower isn’t draining, we need to see the dermatologist about that mole but it takes forever to get an appointment, we’ve got to find a time with that friend we cancelled on twice, and is Mom's balance getting a little worse?
I’ve always loved Reinhold Niebuhr’s Serenity Prayer:
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change
Courage to change the things I can
And the wisdom to know the difference.
With a grateful nod to Mr. Niebuhr, a few things we may be able to change right now:
How We Manage Election Uncertainty
We don’t know what will happen on, or after, November 3rd. But life is less about knowing everything - there will always be more we don’t know than we do - and more about discovering who we are in the not knowing.
David Axelrod, one of President Obama’s advisors, described elections as an MRI for the candidate’s soul. For the rest of us, elections can be a prescription to expand our soul – expand it wide enough to hold the uncertainty. And remember that another word for uncertainty is mystery, which can sit more gently in us.
Then there’s this: The wider our capacity for the unknown, the more comfort we can provide to those still daunted by it all.
Get Out Into It!
Few things can calm the unsteady waters in us like goodhearted action.
- Knock doors for candidates you like. If the thought of doors turns your stomach, I think of it as love work. I’m at the doorstep to understand what my neighbor’s life is like. You could be the only person who listened to them all day. Which can be utterly transformative.
- Drive local candidates to doors. Candidates in rural areas often need drivers. You could be their friendly, cheerleading chauffeur.
- Make a homemade sign. I pulled up in front of a house the other day and there were homemade political signs in the window. These have a singular power: they show that the candidate means so much to the voter, they went to the trouble of making their own sign. Seeing that special effort can give someone who’s undecided a useful pause.
And Then There’s the Tempo of It All
If a tennis match is going sideways for the top tennis players, they slow down the time between points. They may towel off, fiddle with their racket strings, bounce the ball several times before serve. They aren’t deferring to their opponent’s pace, they’re reclaiming power by controlling the clock.
Whenever possible, I’m looking to reclaim the tempo. Walking into the library the other day, I took the steps slowly, asked the librarian her name (Charlotte), and how she was doing (well, thanks!), looked at the bestsellers and added The Pirate Queen to my To Read list.
It only took three more minutes, but gave me connection, a bit of meaning, and perhaps most importantly, a sense that I was steering the ship, rather than being steered.
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